Fashion Charade

Pink is the new Black proclaims one designer proudly. And all i can do is stare open mouthed and shake my head. I am speechless. The only speech i am capable of are monosyllablic and bisyllablic profanites and with dad in the earshot, uttering those are out of the question. Even so, i barely restrain my baser self from baring his true emotions. Who are these people and what do they think of themselves. The women are weird and pretentious and the men hardly look like men. They act and talk like fems and fags. Lets face it. Pink is for girls and gays (fine call me old fashioned...at least its fashioned....the new fashion is hardly fashion). Whoever thinks it can replace grey and black belongs in some kind of a mental asylum.
We all have by now heard of the massive tragedy that took place in Virginia Tech. Disturbed teenager goes on a killing spree spraying people with bullets. Well, these disturbed half men and women go about bombarding our visual senses with obnoxious patterns and garish colour combinations. But whats worse is, people love them and they make front page. What is this obsession with fashion designers. They look like colorblind ataxic imbeciles for most parts. And they presume to dictate and impose on us...Shades of hitler neone?
I for one am perinnealy dressed in shades of grey, dark grey, red and black. Imagine me running around in pink t shirts just cuz its the new black!!! Or better yet, imagine the next batman movie with poor Christian Bale swaggering around in Pink latex. Yeah that will throw the baddies off balance...with laughter. Aything new and out of the box is immediately hailed. Are we so starved for change? Lest we forget, the last time a society opted for a change, WWII happened. This time round its the Fashionists and not the Fascists that are in the fray.
But seriously, think about it. Everything that is unconventional is declared a hit. Resorting to obnoxiousness to stand out is simply pathetic. Its like people deliberately trying to be different, giving different answers in a bid to stand out and be recongnised. If everyone takes the high road, they take the low road. But this craving to be different, to be recognised is in everyone. And the craving to have something different is also a problem with everyone. Stupidity is now a valuable commodity with plenty of supply and even more demand.
But i am starting to digress. The topic is fashion trends. For girls, the jeans get lower and the tops keep creeping up the torso. And hey, im all for it but it doesnt stop there. Guys are into it now too. Low waist jeans and short t shirts. I mean to say...Hello? Next time you check your wardrobe for something to wear give it a thorough search. Maybe youll find your balls in there somewhere too. Three fourths/capris that dont go all the way down and end at the awkward shin area are all the rage. Somehow all they remind me of are street sweepers, with their trouser legs rolled up going at it with this big ass broom, kicking up more dust than removing it.
Designers move around accusing each other of plagiarism. Absurdity is one charge that they are all guilty of and no one thinks of sticking that charge to them. They are turning our movie heroes into barbies. The term metrosexual is just an excuse to make them wear pink and skyblue shirts. If the divide and rule policy is still anything to go by, the only way normal people can rule is by pitting our two greatest enemies, fashion designers and extremist groups against each other. Just accuse the former of using corrupting western influence (though heaven knows they can corrupt all on their own without any external help whatsoever) and the let the extremists take care of the rest.